Vanity

The title of this blog tempts me to do a blog each day for the next seven days about the various sins of the same number. Not sure if I will do that, but still it is tempting. Mainly because I want to talk about something that really vexes me today.

This afternoon I was passing through Western Oregon University's Werner University center, when I heard screams of cheering every few minutes. Curious about what the commotion was about I sought out the Pacific Room where the event was happening. A group called St. Baldricks was shaving the heads of some very sweet and thoughtful young women. These girls, along with many kind young men doing the same thing, were shaving their heads, every lock of precious hair, until they were as bald as John Cena.

I felt an urge suddenly in the pit of my stomach. One that told me, go forward and do it yourself. I assumed, as I watched them gathering up the hair, that they were donating the hair to an organization called "Locks of Love." This organization collects hair and uses it to make wigs for children with cancer who have lost their hair due to chemo treatments. I've donated to them once before when I knocked almost 28 inches of hair from my head. Now I've grown my hair out quite a bit, and it has been a long time since I've had long hair (about 6-7 years actually) but I found myself thinking... "I own a lot of hats. And a couple wigs from Halloween... I could totally do this."

But then this little devil called Vanity started smoking a cigarette on my shoulder. Vanity is naturally my prettiest devil, she has beaten the angel Self Esteem with an ugly stick for years, but she is virtually flawless. She has long red hair that half covers her face like Jessica Rabbit. Her eyes are only slightly less noticeable than her voluptuous breasts and her gorgeous hourglass figure. She has very shapely legs and is always wearing Betty Page-like shoes. Her cigarette is at the end of a long cigarette holder, and she kind of reminds me of a sexy Cruella Devil.So she starts whispering to me "Remember, the Vampire Ball is coming up. And also don't forget how much fun Heather is having, doing your hair every weekend. And I just want to point out that Self Esteem is starting to feel really good about her hair these days. She plays with it non-stop and she thinks that is probably what is getting her so much attention lately. Why would you want to cut all that off?"

I ALMOST listened to her. I found myself nodding to her and saying, "yeah, I mean a lot of other people are donating." WTF?!

No. There are kids who are losing their hair unwillingly regardless of what they have plans to do in a few weeks, and whether or not they have a lot of hats, and their self esteem is suffering from it too. I have never felt so good about lining up a good flick to my shoulder and kicking that skinny legged bitch right off her perch. Her cigarette singed my coat, but it's only a minor burn compared to her crumpled look sitting awkwardly on the floor at Western.

Now comes the part where I am angry. I walked up the sign up booth and asked him if the hair was getting donated to Locks of Love. IT IS NOT!!!!

These girls are just shaving their heads to make a statement to find a cure for cancer.

Let me disillusion you people here. The people behind the cures for cancer? They are not interested in whether or not a few college girls are willingly bald. They are interested in the $10 this charity was charging for you to cut your hair off. So I donated my $10 and kept my hair, because that is all that the organization really wants, but they don't really deserve it. See, it isn't hard to contact a fellow charity  that is donating to children with cancer and saying "Hey, we are organizing a college hair shaving. Wanna come collect the hair so those little kids in your Leukemia wards have hair again?" No,  isn't. Instead I am watching as lock after lock falls onto the floor and is clumped up in a big garbage bag that ends up in a University trash can.

Vanity had a nice big grin at me then, as she was pleased to know that I wasn't getting rid of my hair. But you know, I still might?

I want your thoughts. And I would like to know if anyone would be willing to join me in going to the salon and saying "Take it all, and give it to a little girl who needs it." I have hats, and my hair grows back.

Maybe I'm just another young person who needs a cause to fight for, and maybe my personal battle with what is apparently my deadliest sin is helping this to be my cause. But you know, I just think that if you are going to give to something, don't slap another charity in the face while you do it. Do you know how hard it is to get these wigs to these poor kids? What they go through, and how many wasted inches are left on Salon floors?

Okay Vanity. Take your little seat on my shoulder, and smoke your cigarette all you want, but realize that you are going to be one bald babe real soon.

I think you should take a look at this song by Rascall Flatts if you need inspiration to shave your head with me ladies (or gents with more than 8inches of hair to give)